This past year, I’ve tolerated and hurt from trying to depend on so many people. But why? Why do i have to depend on certain people to get something that I want? I’ve come across people that find me a bother, people that just do not to associate with me and my problems, and people that say they would help but in the end dreads it and wouldn’t do it if they weren’t forced to help me. You know what? I hate coming across this. I hate it when people do things but aren’t doing it from their heart. Generosity? None. I like how people can be straight forward. Tell me no and a reason as to why you answer like that, and if its reasonable ill understand. If its unreasonable, I won’t take it to heart but Ill be in awe to your answers.
Honestly, I think what I asked for (in terms of my specific examples that i won’t share) are pretty small. Its not wasteful of your entire life, and in a way its helpful to me and a good learning experience. In the end, if they helped me, they would be able to see how far i progressed and how little i won’t need them anymore - and to them this should be a GREAT thing because its like they don’t want anything to do with me at all. I help you… yet you can’t help me? I plan to help you in the future, I’m working hard at it too, yet you can’t help me on one little thing? Its so little and its not worth getting angry over at, but its the fact that I keep encountering people like this and its annoys the crap out of me. Say it to my freaking face that you don’t want to help me with ANYTHING at all, and ill be GLAD to hear your honesty.
BS. Im so freaking angry. In some ways, even though I’m not considered “independent” as others would define it, I like to think of myself as fully independent even though I am living under the roof of my parents. Im glad to have struck independency at a young age, it made me mature a lot.
Quite thankful for that.